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Just another unusual girl on the net. A writer to be. x

Friday, February 25, 2011

I've been doing what I'm told, I've been busy Growing Up.

This year (2011) I thought it would be just nice to not write and leave my blog just like that. Keeping all the things personal and all. But then I realize, it isn't the same. Really. When I dont write, It's empty. A whole new me is empty. So, I decided to get back to writing. Though no one ever read it it's okay as long as I can keep on writing. But I hope you read this until the bottom of this post. You should. Then you'll know how sorry I am.

Basically, this year i've been so busy with schools and all. you know, extra classes, tuitions. I've to know how to manage my time now. I rarely online now. Unless I feel like tired and could use some 'get away' then I update my tumblr. Which is still never boring. At all. Tumblr never fails me when it comes to entertain me. Facebook has been really empty. I mean mine lah. Not yours. I rarely on my facebook so literally no one writes on my wall or something. What I want to share with you is now I felt like the whole new brand of me. Seriously, I dont know what makes me think that but I think it's because I see things a lot different now. I'm nearly turning seventeen this 20th of march. I start to take some of the things seriously now. I myself no longer care about school's drama or any of that shit anymore. Cause to me it doesn't really important. So yeah. If it matters, it would be the last thing on my mind. So you get the picture right.

Year 2011, my grammar sometimes still sucked. I know. Never mind. I would still work my ass off to fix that thing. I'm sure it wont be long until I finally conquered my grammar. So don't judge. If you still want to then go ahead. Like I said, I don't care about any of that shit anymore. As you all know I already disable my formspring account. Yeah I already did. It's been two months already and I'm happy as shit. No kidding. Formspring is fun it just that people get the wrong term of using formspring. This website provide the asking box for people to ask questions about yourself. It depends on the user actually. On how they want you to ask about certain things or whatever. But things get really nasty as the anon (girls or boys) started to throw shit and tell bad things about the user. Trying to let you down and all. They start to judge the user and all. This sucks. Really. Those who have low-self esteem are usually the main people who send all this 'hate mail' . And I just want to say to all the formspring user Never Ever believed what they write about you because the only person who knows well about yourself is YOU. Only you. So other people perspective about you doesn't really counts. That just how nature works (if you know what I meant) So yeah apart of all this things, Formspring was fun.

I realize how awful I used to be. I know this sound a little chessy but yeah. I know exactly how bad my attitude was last year. I judged a lot of people. I admit it. (well who doesnt) I've hurt like so many hearts. And I'm ashamed I've been a terrible heart breaker on boys. I simply played their heart not on purpose but still I've hurt their heart. But Don't worry boys, I'm still waiting for my karma on that. So yeah, the bitchiness of me from year 14 has been removed. I dont judge anyone anymore. Because I have felt what it is like to be judged by others. So yeah, karma's everywhere. Just waiting to bash you back. Cause I fucking can tell you on how one could judge and then get it all wrong. Yes I freaking can. Ever heard of 'How people treat you is their karma, How you react is yours' ? So yeah this is so fucking relevant. When I first heard this I suddenly realize the same thing happen to me and others. So take note, mark this word. I don't judge people anymore well at least not on the outside anymore (inside doesn't count because that's a whole different thing) So my advice no matter girls or boys, next time you're thinking you just want to snap, hold on to your damn tongue cause karma snaps back. Twice as bad as you did to others.

I'm sorry if this post annoyed you. But this is how I feel. I try to change myself in a good way. But if people call this 'pretanding', You're so dead wrong. Cause I'm not. I'm trying to give people their 'good karma' and hopes that in future I'll get mine too. So I'm sorry if you are one of those people who I have hurt so much with my attitude and the way I treated you. I'm sorry and believe me this is absolutely from the bottom of my heart. xx

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